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One of the key features of any successful wedding is making sure that all those involved are happy and familiar with their role and the part they are expected to play.
In order to help achieve this we have put together a summary below, of the key wedding roles, and the activities expected from those carrying out hose rolesin a traditional wedding.

:: The Best Man

One of the main duties of the Best Man is organising the all important ' stag night' prior to the wedding. On the actual wedding day itself or the reception, he may be called upon to help with deliveries/pickups and other general organisation matters.

Traditionally the most difficult part of the day for most best man is the dreaded speeches. This is not surprising considering it is highly likely you will find yourself in the unusual position of addressing (and wanting to impress) a large crowd of people (some who'll know you, some won't). With the added pressure of having a vide camera pointing at you, it's not suprising that most best men often feel a little nervous.

One of the best tips we can give you, is try and put things in prespective, and remember that your audience will actually be rooting for you and will generally be willing to laugh at even the weakest of jokes!

Main duties are as follows:

6 Months before...

  • Discuss the wedding plans with the bride, groom and chief bridesmaid.
  • Help to choose the ushers and explain their duties to them.

4 Months before...

  • Organise the stag party.
  • Prepare your speech for the reception.
  • Provide the Ushers with a list of close family members who should have special seating arrangements at the ceremony.
  • If necessary, visit the ceremony and the reception venues with the bride and groom to check on timings, parking arrangements etc.

1 Week before...

  • Attend the wedding rehearsal.
  • Make sure groom has all the necessary documents for both ceremony and honeymoon. (ie/ passports/ flight tickets etc).
  • Arrange transport for yourself and the groom to ceremony.
  • Arrange transport to and from the reception.
  • If required, arrange going away car for the bride and groom from the reception.
  • Liaise with the ushers on the final arrangements.
  • Make a note of details and availability of emergency taxi companies.
  • Finalise and rehearse speech.
  • Consider having a hair cut

1 Day before...

  • Arrange to collect any hired clothing and accessories.
  • Wash car if driving to the ceremony.
  • Organise decorations for the going away car.

On the day...

  • Drive groom to ceremony
  • Hold bride’s ring until the appropriate point in the ceremony
  • Give payment check to the officiant either just before or just after the ceremony (the money is customarily provided by the groom and his family)

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:: The Chief Bridesmaid

The 'Chief Bridesmaid' is usually close friend or sister of the bride. If however she is already married herself or if the bride is a widow and is re-marrying, she becomes known as the 'Matron of Honour'. One of her key roles is to liaise closely with the bride during all the wedding preparations and help look after the other bridesmaids, flower girl and page boys.

Main duties are as follows:

6 Months before...

  • Meet with the bride, groom and best man to discuss the arrangements.

4 Months before...

  • Help the bride to choose her dress and the bridesmaids dresses.

3 Months before...

  • Help the bride with addressing envelopes, recording wedding gifts, shopping, and other important pre-wedding tasks.

1 Week before...

  • Attend the wedding rehearsal.

1 Day before...

  • Arrange to collect any hired clothing and accessories.

On the day...

  • Make sure bouquets are ready for the bride, bridesmaids and flower girl.
  • Help bride with her hair, make-up and dress.
  • Help the other bridesmaids, flower girl and page boys get dressed. Give them any final instructions on their duties.
  • Leave for ceremony (normally around 15 minutes before the bride).

At the ceremony...

  • Arrange the bride's dress and veil.
  • Follow the bride and her father up the aisle (accompanied by the best man).
  • Help the bride arrange her train and veil at the altar
  • Hold the bride's bouquet during the ceremony.
  • Witness the signing of the register if required.
  • Leave the church after the bride and groom (accompanied by the best man).
  • Depart for the reception after the bride and groom (with any other bridesmaids and best man).

At the reception...

  • Stand in the receiving line and greet the guests.
  • Help to display and record gifts received.
  • Distribute slices of the wedding cake to the guests.
  • Have the first dance with the best man.

Afterwards...

  • Help the bride change clothes after the reception
  • Take charge of the bridal gown after the wedding

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:: The Bridesmaids

A bridesmaid is usually a close friend of the bride, or a sister of either the bride or groom.. Older bridesmaids may wish to liaise with the bride and chief bridesmaid during the wedding preparations and help with the choice of dresses. Younger ones will not be expect to take an active part in the planning stage.

6 Months before...

  • Discuss the plans with the bride, groom, best man and chief bridesmaid

1 Week before...

  • Attend the wedding rehearsal.

1 Day before...

  • Arrange to collect any hired clothing and accessories.


On the day...

  • Receive any final instructions from the chief bridesmaid.
  • Get dressed and help any younger attendants.
  • Leave for ceremony (around 15 minutes before bride).

At the ceremony...

  • Follow behind the chief bridesmaid or matron of honour up the aisle.
  • Leave church after chief bridesmaid.
  • Depart for reception with chief bridesmaid and any other bridesmaids.

At the reception...

  • Stand in the receiving line and greet the guests.
  • Distribute slices of the wedding cake to the guests.

Afterwards...

  • Return any hired clothing and accessories.

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:: The Ushers

The ushers are chosen by the groom and his best man and are usually friends, brothers or relatives of the bride and groom. As a general guide you will need one usher for every 50 guests. Generally it is the responsibility of the best man to ensure the ushers are aware of their duties.

6 Months before...

  • Make arrangements for purchase/ hire of clothes and agree who will pay for them.

1 Week before...

  • Confirm final travel arrangements with the best man and any other ushers, including the time of arrival at the church or register office.
  • Obtain list of those guests requiring a personal escort to their seats from the best man..
  • Attend the wedding rehearsal if required.
  • Consider having a hair-cut.
  • Obtain large umbrellas

1 Day before...

  • Collect any hired clothing and accessories.

On the day...

  • Collect buttonholes and order of service sheets from the brides home.
  • Arrive at the church at least half an hour before the ceremony is due to start.

At the ceremony...

  • Help with car parking facilities
  • Greet the guests and hand out the buttonholes, order of service sheets, maps to reception etc.
  • Ensure the officiant has order of service sheets for the bride and groom.
  • Seat couples with young babies and children near the exit.
  • Escort the brides mother and appropriate guests to their seats.
  • Assist the photographer.
  • Ensure the church is left tidy and check for any left property and unused order of service sheets.
  • Make sure all guests have transport to the reception.

At the reception...

  • Assist with car parking facilities.
  • Offer drinks to the guests as they arrive.
  • Assist any elderly or infirm guests.
  • Help decorate newlyweds car

Afterwards...

  • Return any hired clothing and accessories.
  • Oversee transfer of all gifts to a secure location after reception

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:: Father of the bride

As Father of the Bride, your key features of your role are as follows:

  • Give your daughter support, keep her calm and, above all, make sure she gets to the ceremony on time!
  • Ensure the cars arrive to take the bridesmaids, mother of the bride and other members of the family to the ceremony.
  • Assist your daughter into the bridal car, making sure that her dress is not crushed.
  • Walk her slowly up the aisle and if necessary place her hand in the groom's as you 'give her away'.
  • For register office marriages, the bride's father normally escorts his daughter into the ceremony, although she can chose for one of her attendants to carry out this role.
  • It is traditional for you to sit in the front row during the ceremony on the left-hand side.In most church weddings, once the couple are officially husband and wife, you escort the groom's mother to the vestry for the signing of the register.
  • After the ceremony, you move back down the aisle escorting the groom's mother on your right hand side, and following behind the bride's mother and the groom's father.

After the Ceremony

  • Traditionally you do not ride with your daughter, but take your place - usually in the third car - following the bridesmaids and best man, or in the fourth car, accompanying the groom's mother.

At the Reception

  • The father of the bride and the mother of the bride, are the hosts of the reception.
  • In a formal receiving line, your place is second in the line, after the bride's mother.
  • If the bride and groom prefer to welcome everyone on their own, your job is to mingle with the guests, circulate and make introductions.
  • During the Speeches (which usually take place after the meal has finished and prior to the cutting of the cake) you will the first person to speak.
  • In your speech, you should welcome the guests, praise your new son-in-law and congratulate the happy couple.
  • At the end of your your speech, you should finish with a toast to the bride and groom.

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:: Flower girls

  • The flower girl traditionally walks in front of the bridal party as they move down the aisle at the start of the ceremony.
  • If the church permits, she can scatter petals or confetti on the ground for you to walk through. Alternatively she can carry a basket of confetti or petals during the ceremony, which can be distributed outside at the end of the service.

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:: Ringbearer

  • The ring bearer carries the ring or rings, often on a cushion, to be presented during the ceremony. The ring bearer is usually a child, can be male or female, and provides an ideal way of invilving children in your ceremony.
  • He/she can be dressed to match your other attendants or have a completely individual outfit to make them stand out.
  • An older child can also fulfil this role but can perhaps hold the rings in their boxes instead.




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